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Ben Folds Five

Army (Live UNC Memorial Hall, Chapel Hill, NC, 9/18/08)

Well i thought about the army,
dad said, son you're fuckin high.
and i thought, yeah there's a first for everything,
so i took my old man's advice.

three sad semesters,
it was only fifteen grand.
spent in bed i thought about the army,
i dropped out and joined a band instead.

Grew a moustache and a mullet,
got a job at chic-fil-a.
citing artistic differences the band broke up in may,
and in june reformed without me, and they got a different name.

i nuked another grandma's apple pie
and hung my head in shame.
Been thinking a lot today.
been thinking a lot today.

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ohhhh, i think i'll write a screenplay.
ohhhh, i think i'll take it to la.
ohhhh, i think i'll get it done yesterday (aww shit).
In this time of introspection.

on the eve of my election,
i say to my reflection
god, please spare me more rejection.
cause my peers they criticize me,

and my ex-wives all despise me.
try to put it all behind me,
but my redneck past is nipping at my heels

i've been thinking a lot today.
i've been thinking a lot today.
i've been thinking a lot today.
i thought about the army...