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Tim Minchin



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Tim Minchin

The Hammer

Look at these trophies
See how my trophies
Gleam in the sunlight
See how they shine

What do you think it took to become
English hammer throwing champion
1969

Do you think in that moment
When my big moment came
That I treated the rules
With casual disdain?
Well? Like hell!

As I stepped up to the circle
Did I change my plan?
Hmm? What?

As I chalked up my palms
Did I wave my hands?
I did not!

As I started my spin
Did I look at the view
Did I drift off and dream
For a minute or two?
Do you think I faltered
Or amended my rotation?
Do you think I altered
My intended elevation?
As the hammer took off
Did I change my grunt
From the grunt I had practiced
For many a month?
Not a jot, not a dot
Did I stray from the plot
Not a detail of my throw
Was adjusted or forgotten
Not even when the hammer left my hands
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And sailed up
Up above the stands
Did I let myself go
No no no no no no
No no no no NO! no no
No

If you want to throw the hammer for your country
You have to stay inside the circle all the time
And if you want to make the team
You don't need happiness or self esteem
You just need to keep your feet inside the line

Sing, children -- 2 3 4
If you want to throw the hammer for your country

(Bambinatum est magitum)
You have to stay inside the circle all the time
(Circular magitum, magitum)
And if you want to teach success
You don't use sympathy or tenderness
(Tenderness)
You have to force the little squits to toe the line

Sing, Jenny -- 2 3 4

If you want to throw the hammer for your country
(Bambinatum, bambinatum gloria magitum)
You have to stay inside the circle all the time
(Circulum est deus, deus)
As I've just one simple rule
To hammer throwing, life, and school

Life's a ball so learn to throw it
Find the bally line and toe it
And always keep your feet inside the line
Now get out