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Stephen Lynch
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Half a Man
All my days
I've lived with my disgrace
I'm afraid to show my face
Or at least take off my
Underwear
See I was born
Like a halfway neutered pet
I don't have a matching set
It's a part of me
that just aint fair
please don't stare
Well Im a gambolin' man without two dice
Im like uncle ben with only one grain o' rice
Oh to have two testies would be so nice
But Im
Half a man
Yeah Im
Half a man
Want to die
And we'll all just call it quits
I can't find a cup that fits
And in baseball games I feel so dumb
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When I hear 'Ball one'
Oh my god,
How could you have been so cruel
Try to give me one family jewl
And the one that's there must feel so sad
He's a lonely man
Well I'm a marathon runner with just one leg
I'm a falopian tube with just one egg
Oh I want another testi do I have to beg
Or be
Half a man
Yeah
Half a man
Well I'm a tweedle dee with no tweedle dum
And I'm a hitch-hikin' hobo without his thumb
And I'm a yohoho with no bottle o' rum
Im just
Half a man
Yeah
Half a man
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