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Anxious & Aspy

Don't call me next week.
I think I'll be busy all summer.
It's better if we don't speak
And you'll be glad we didn't in September.
So when you see me raise my hand,
Ignore the dirt under my fingernails.
Remember I'm not average
And fitting in here is pass or fail.

Now I'm digging holes in my backyard
So I'm ready to climb back up
From the moment at which I decide
Not to keep my mouth shut anymore

It's already next year.
What have I been doing all summer?
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And will you still think I'm weird
If I don't break the silence by December?
So when you look me in the eye,
Ignore the way that I'm not looking back
Remember I'm not mean
When the medians and modes attack.

I've been digging holes in my backyard
Even though I know I shouldn't.
Because they're easier for me to fill
And to climb out from than the one that I put my foot in.

I don't think I'm coming out to play.
It feels like starting over every day