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Mark Nicholas



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Mark Nicholas

Selective Memory Loss

Static stocking feet
on fuzzy beige plush shag.
Talking through commercials
and the standard sitcom lag.
A shock to my system
would be so incredibly welcome,
but the room just keeps on waiting.
The light just keeps on fading.

Tonight I won't sleep.
I don't want to dream.
I don't own this life.
I don't know what it means.
Tonight I won't move.
I don't want to feel.
I don't know this place.
I don't know what's real.

Faking that I'm tired
so I'm left alone to pout.
Laying on the edge of comfort,
sagging soft with doubt.
A reason to revolt
would be everything I need,
but the air is stale and silent.
The darkness somehow violent.

Tonight I won't sleep.
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I don't want to dream.
I don't own this life.
I don't know what it means.
Tonight I won't move.
I don't want to feel.
I don't know this place.
I don't know what's real.

Won't you show me
how my choices have made me a whore?
Can't you dare me to stop
and not do this anymore?
Even casual suggestions,
or part-time interventions,
would be better than the quiet
of this pointless self-confession.

Tonight I won't sleep.
I don't want to dream.
I don't own this life.
I don't know what it means.
Tonight I won't move.
I don't want to feel.
I don't know this place.
I don't know what's real.