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Drew Monson



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Drew Monson

My Comeback

I left you for so long I'm sorry.
I'll make my comeback now
And tell my story
Of where I was
I hope no one was worried
Probably thought that I was
Dating lots of guys or smoking weed
One of those is true it's up to you to guess.

I was born inside Modesto Cali.
The highest male voice in the Central Valley
They laughed at me
I kinda looked like Dewey
My choices were; to cry myself to sleep or try to be funny.

At 9 years old I got a hold of a camera.
10 plus 1(?) I started posting vids now.
It was kinda like a dance
It was kinda like a breakdown!
Screamed about metro-station,
Hung with all my bros
I haven't had the doctor check but I am thinking that my hairline kinda rose?
And you know some hate comments get to me.
Like the ones that say I was more conventionally attractive
When I was 13
18 now, I made a pizza backpack.
Did some stand up but I gave it up because of anxiety attacks!
I was a threatened, then I was a meme, sir.
I drove to L.A.
No I took an uber
I am so glad my turtle didn't roast in the car
Peta don't fret
Rodeo Jones has a happy life
She has a basking area
I swear I know how to take care of her.

(frantic yell-talking)
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She's not miserable and trying to get out of her tank in the background she's just aggressively begging that's what red eared sliders do I can't feed her as much as she wants or she'll get too big for her shell!

For some time it was smooth… but something broke it soon.

Shyness
Depression
Trump is prez
I can't get outta bed

Shyness
Depression
Trump is prez
So I can't get outta bed

I can't get outta bed
I can't get outta bed
No no no no no no-
I can get outta bed
I can get outta bed

I left you for so long I'm sorry
I'll make my comeback now, and tell my story
Of what comes next.
I wanna tease you now some
I will make vids
I will release an album!
Did you know
I now use dry shampoo?
You'll see me on the street
With my clean hair
And be like…who?

I am me still
I still go to goodwill
So now its' time to film.